Learning Lessons...not always as planned

I like to give the boys many opportunities to try things out and see what they like. Seems like more often than not, I realize what they do NOT like. It's kind of nice though...narrowing down their interests, but things don't always go as planned.

Case in point....KARATE. I signed both boys up for it. Jacob didn't like it from the start. He thought it was corny, didn't like the grunting and hates hitting things (more importantly, hates being hit by anything which will become important in a minute). Nicholas loved it. I was really surprised. He liked the control, the moves and the teacher. He never really "likes" other kids. It takes him a while to warm up and trust people, so he is always very quiet in these settings. That boy definitely has a circle of trust and you have to earn your way into it. Anyway, Nicholas didn't go to karate tonight because he is just coughing so much and congested. Tonight was the last night and they had "moc-fights". They aren't supposed to make contact and if they do, it should not be hard. Jacob was with a kid who was about 6 inches taller and 50 pounds heavier. From the get go, he pounded Jacob...hard. He kicked Jacob...hard. I really could've sat through that, but he was LAUGHING the whole time. Jacob kept looking at me. I kind of put my hand up to tell him to stop the boy. He said to him, "You are doing it too hard." "You are hurting me." As a mom, it is so hard to know what to do. Boys will be boys. There is a sensay (teacher) who wasn't watching. There are a ton of other parents, so you don't want to be a ninny. Ugh. Finally, the kid pounded Jacob and Jacob started crying and left the room. He was hurt and embarassed. Needless to say, it's a good thing that tonight was the last night. My child was mad. I was mad. Once I got him settled, he came back in and sat with me. The teacher never did say anything to us. The child didn't apologize. The grandpa did try to tell me that the kid didn't hit that hard. I told the grandpa, "He DID hit him hard and it is certainly not your place to tell my child what hurts and doesn't hurt."
Jacob now of course wants nothing to do with karate. BUT, the best part of this story is that when we got home, he told Nicholas. Nicholas said, "If I had been there, I'd a given him a butt whoopin' for you." Of all the things I said to Jacob, none of them made him feel as happy and safe as his brother did. That, I LOVE.
So, mommy notes:
Jacob likes anything that is non-contact. He likes running. He does not like physical contact sports. He loves drawing, acting and recreating things. He likes soccer. He likes tennis. He loves his dog. He hates being lectured. He loves to talk. When he is mad, there is no reasoning with him. He is passionate and loving and almost always HAPPY. He likes to be involved in school activities. His best friends are girls who think he is the best. He loves being at home with his family.
Nicholas loves music with a heavy beat. He'll try anything once. He likes most sports. He does NOT like running. He is loyal. He thinks deeply. If you'll play with him, he'll play forever. He likes yard work. He hates housework. He is all about the outdoors and getting dirty. He loves spiking his hair and is ever so popular with the girls. He loves being at home with his family.
Oh these boys. I love them so. I love who they are. I love watching them really grow into their skin. I love, love, love them.